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YEA
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Beta Pi
Blog’s purpose: to bring ATO, Beta Pi Chapter Brothers and ATO Gal-Pals
together. The blog is not to be taken
seriously - it is meant for fun.
The
Beta Pi Blog is non-political. It
includes
To get
there, go to web address: http://beta-pi-blog.blogspot.com
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The
Beta Pi Blog depends upon the generous contributions of stories and anecdotes
from viewers like you. This month, Gold
Contributor Franklin Jeronimus Biller, III, a/k/a Buck - has made two very
generous contributions. Without his
contributions, this edition of the Blog might not have been possible, due to
temporary writer’s block and unseasonable Spring Fever. Thanks to my dear friend Buck!
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“MEDICAL
ADVISORY”
By
Frank J. Biller, Medical Advocate, Metaphysician, Alchemist and SorcererSo I had this colonoscopy yesterday. What a pain in the butt.
The
cute little nurse says “Roll over on your left side Mr. Miller” as she pulls
back the back flap on my hospital nightie revealing my nether regions from the southern
exposure. My drop dead gorgeous anesthesiologist says, “Now let’s review your
chart Frank just to make sure everything is in order. As she starts the IV she
asks, “your name is…?”
The next thing I know I am in an opioid dream.
I am revisiting my pledge training as Matt Hart picks up the fire extinguisher and
starts rambling about “mystic enemas.”
Matt’s face morphs into Chet Brewer’s as
a guest speaker as Larry and I are conducting pledge training and
grinning as the pledges squirm.
Then suddenly I wake up.
I am
looking at a TV monitor that has something that looks like Space Invaders on
the screen. “Hi Frank!” chirps the 12 year old proctologist. “You
woke up a bit early. Are you feeling any pressure?” “No Doc, I am fine”, I
reply. “That’s your colon. We are almost done.”
Next thing they are wheeling me
into the “fart room.” Apparently, they
blow a lot of air up your wazoo whilst checking the boogie-cave-walls for
gremlins. It takes a few minutes to kind of
“let the air out."
My son comes to pick me up and
take me home. We get home and I offer him a glass of wine, naturally pouring
one for myself. “Ah, Dad, I don’t think you should have a glass of wine
tonight”, says Jack. “I am just fine”, I protest. “Well Dad, you’ve been
jabbering like a Chihuahua on speed for the last 30 minutes and you’re not
making a lot of sense.” So I deferred
and went with a hot green tea. We discussed world affairs for about an hour
then Jack headed home. I fell asleep on
the couch about an hour later watching “Comedians in Cars Going for Coffee.”
Anyway, this is all just
colorful background for a sincere piece of medical advice. My procedure went
well, I have no issues and I am good for 10 years until I need to go through
this ordeal again. Same thing happened 10 years ago when I had my last one. As
unpleasant as the prep is and as weird as the “mystic enema” is, I have to
recommend that you all do this thing when your physician advises. Just don’t
make the mistake I did. I was given the option to have the procedure “first
thing in the morning” or “last one of the day.”
I chose “last one of the day” at 3:00 pm on Friday. Big mistake. Opt for
morning. I had to split up the torturous “cleansing” process into Thursday
night AND Friday morning.
Let me tell you,
“Red Eye” is not just the name for watered down whiskey in bad Westerns. God
Bless the fine people at Preparation H.
I also was unable to eat sold
food for 48 hours instead of 24 (if I went for morning). It’s Saturday night as
I write this and I am eating everything in sight trying to get my strength back
up. I had 3 protein shakes today and just ate half a cow (burned off on my
grill and washed down with a fine Cabernet of course) and I still feel puny.
So, here are the take-aways:
Get the freakin’ procedure when
your Doc says so.
Book it in the morning.
Remember to be prepared . . . .
Don’t argue with your kids.
Drink green tea for one night. It won’t kill you and you won’t miss anything.
Your friend,
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THE
BUCK BILLER SPORTS PAGE
By
Frank J. Biller, Beta Pi Blog Sports CorrespondentHi Larry,
You may want to post this on the
blog for all of our ATO Vandy sports fanatics like me. I watched the
Vandy Boys defeat the infidels from Duke in the “Smart guys vs smart guys”
season opener on SEC+ last night 9-1 behind our super new freshman class.
I sent the email below to my sister
who is a big sports fan so she can watch our baseball team. Her grandson
is a 14-year-old pitcher with an 85-MPH fastball who would love to play in a
program like ours if he can make the grades (physical and academic). I
have to note that Derek Mason just signed his highest rated class for football
and Coach Bryce Drew and Coach Stephanie White just both signed 2 5-star
recruits for Basketball next year.
The men’s team is one of the top 5
classes in the country with 2 5-stars and a 4-star. There is one more 5-star
guy out there we are trying to sign and he was in Memorial today (sitting with
the other 2 5-stars) when we beat Florida. I sure hope he gets hot-boxed
and signs up. We could be a top 10 team next year in men’s and women’s
Buckets!!!
Regards,
Buck
P.S. to you, JD, Boss and others in
and around Nashville- go over and watch the Dores Baseball team. We ARE
Alabama in baseball! Support the team and Coach Tim Corbin. I will
come down for at least one series.
P.P.S.- I have booked a room in
Omaha for this summer’s College World Series. I invite all Tics to join
me and the Vandy Boys as we vie for our second National championship.
From: frank biller
Sent: Saturday, February 17, 2018 5:54 PM
To: Big Jerry Smith
Subject: Vanderbilt baseball this year- Please forward to Gabe I do not have his email address
Sent: Saturday, February 17, 2018 5:54 PM
To: Big Jerry Smith
Subject: Vanderbilt baseball this year- Please forward to Gabe I do not have his email address
Vanderbilt baseball has
two No. 1-ranked recruiting classes on the same roster for the first time since
winning the 2014 national championship.
Could that surplus of projected talent come
together for a memorable season?
The answers will start to come on Friday when
No. 10 Vanderbilt starts the 2018 season with a home series against Duke.
VANDERBILT BASEBALL ON TV
March 16: Vanderbilt at Mississippi State (SEC
Network, "Bases Loaded" coverage)
March 23: LSU at Vanderbilt (ESPNU)
March 24: LSU at Vanderbilt (ESPNU)
March 25: LSU at Vanderbilt (ESPN2)
March 31: Vanderbilt at Florida (ESPNU)
April 1: Vanderbilt at Florida (SEC Network)
April 5: Georgia at Vanderbilt (SEC Network)
April 15: Ole Miss at Vanderbilt (ESPNU)
April 19: Vanderbilt at Missouri (ESPNU)
May 1: Louisville at Vanderbilt (SEC Network)
May 13: Vanderbilt at Tennessee (SEC Network)
KEEPING
TABS:
Here is
a reminder of the Brothers and Sisters we have lost.
BECKY
BRUNING MANYAK, died October 19, 2017.
Beta Pi Blog, Vol.2017, No.07. Archive: Sept. 2017Obituary:
http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/washingtonpost/obituary.aspx?n=rebecca-manyak&pid=187110606
ROB BLANKENHORN, died
December, 2016.
Beta Pi Blog, Vol.2017, No.05, (See Comment by Dick
Stoner). Archive: Sept. 2017EDWARD G. “TED” STEPHANY, died January 20, 2016.
Beta Pi Blog, Vol.2016, No.01, Archive: Jan. 2016
J. NEAL CRENSHAW, died November 12, 2014.
Beta Pi Blog, Vol.2014, No.08, Archive: Nov. 2014
Beta Pi Blog, Vol.2014, No.10, Archive: Dec. 2014
Beta Pi Blog, Vol.2014, No.08, Archive: Nov. 2014
Beta Pi Blog, Vol.2014, No.10, Archive: Dec. 2014
MILES WALSH, died in
July, 2013.
Beta Pi Blog, Vol.2013, No.05, Comments Section
(over 50 comments), Archive: Aug.2013
DAVID HOWE, died
November 30, 2006.
Beta Pi Blog, Vol.2006, No.68, Archive: Dec.
2006. Beta Pi Blog, Vol.2007, No.30, Archive: May. 2007
KURT WAGNER, died in July, 2002.
Beta Pi Blog, Vol.2016, No.02, Archive: Jan. 2016
ALEXANDER WILSON, died April 9, 1977.
Beta Pi Blog, Vol.2006, No.25, Lowenstein Essay
Contest. Archive: Aug. 2006Beta Pi Blog, Vol.2006, No.33, Honoring Alex and Laura. Archive: Sept. 2006
Beta Pi Blog, Vol.2006, No.45, Tale-o-Pig-Roast. Archive: Sept. 2006
Beta Pi Blog, Vol.2006, No.50, Winner Essay Contest. Archive: Oct. 2006
Beta Pi Blog, Vol.2017, No.05, Alexander Wilson. Archive: Sept. 2017
Alex and Laura are
buried at the Nashville National Cemetery. The cemetery at 1420 Gallatin
Pike South, Madison, TN 37115. Alex and
Laura are at Section KK, Site 794.
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THE
ARCHIVES
If you
have never explored the “Archives” in this Blog – it is toward the top of the
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access it by clicking on the Month and Year, and it will drop down with
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click on that, and it takes you to that issue.
You can then post a comment to that issue. It’s never too late to post a comment,
right?
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